Saturday, 26 December 2015

Mystery Christmas Card

One of our Christmas cards arrived damaged.
Was that a bite out of the envelope?

Weirdly, when we opened it, it wasn't even signed.

But then I took another look at the shape of the bite mark and it all became clear.

It was obviously a Christmas card sent to Nigel by his beloved koi carp.  He had been forced to leave them behind in the pond of our previous house, but they had not forgotten him.

Of course the card wasn't signed - fish can't write!

Maybe lovely Geraldine - to whom they belong now- had helped them with the address. Thanks Geraldine.

Thursday, 24 December 2015

Christmas Stockings

For years I gave the kids little novelties and scraps of this and that in their Christmas  stockings only to see them go straight out when we did the post Christmas charity shop trip. It has taken me time to learn that the enjoyment  we share over a wind-up hedgehog or (this year) a yodelling flamingo will already have peaked in the shop and will not be increased by our bringing the item home.

However, this year our Christmas stockings are showing TWO signs of my increasing maturity.

Firstly, this Santa has been planning to fill those stockings with truly useful items like socks and toothbrushes.  Hopefully nobody will be yearning after the yodelling flamingo or the windscreen wiper specs.
But the second sign of my growing “maturity” is not so good.  
Where is the bag full of everybody’s favourite toiletries?  Where have I hidden it? 
It was quite large.  It can’t just have disappeared. 
  Maybe I left it in the shop and never brought it home?

By this time next year my family may have packed me off to a residential home for Santas who can no longer remember where they parked their sleigh.

Tuesday, 22 December 2015

Christmas Drama

We have had a Christmas drama. I didn’t say much about it as I was ashamed of my own selfishness. 
At Christmas, the prospect of relaxing in your own sitting room is far more potent than the  idea of an exotic holiday.
But we have been having a chimney breast and wood-burning stove installed. 
Everything in our sitting  room has been covered in sheets of plastic as if we had  made the decor choice ‘murder investigation ‘.  
The Christmas tree was queueing outside the back door, the unused fairy-lights clustering  on the landing.  
I am so callous that in this era of displaced families and refugees I just really wanted my fireplace finished by the time that Pascoe, Perran and Carenza got home for Christmas.
The fireplace guy suffered various setbacks, becoming  grimmer as the weeks passed. Finally with Pascoe and Carenza already here and Perran on his way the woodburner went in last Friday. 
Okay, so the glass is broken and we can’t use it until  we get a replacement.
Okay, so there’s still a gap that needs filling down the side of the fireplace.
But the plastic has come off the furniture, the tree has gone up. We are home.

Now all that we need to do is not switch on the TV news.

Sunday, 20 December 2015

Wise men follow the star...

Following last year's adventures when we were out of the house, the wise men have once again stumbled into difficulties, courtesy of Carenza.